Notes on Parenting

Insights for parenting babies, toddlers, teens, and young adults.

Tuesday, August 17, 2010

Remember You Are a Husband First

It is often fairly common in marriages that the children become the focal point of the relationship, and that the children are what hold the marriage together.

While it is important to spend time with your children, and invest in them, you need to spend time with your wife as well. You wouldn’t be the father you are, if you didn’t have your wife.

It is always a shame when men, when asked who they are, respond with a career position, followed by a church or volunteer position, than dad, and lastly (and sometimes not mentioned) husband. You are a husband, first and foremost. You need to love, care for, and nurture your relationship with your wife, the mother of your children. Again, you would not be a lot things in this world without the support of your wife.

There are several things that you can do to help you put your wife first:
  • Remember to date your wife. Have a date night once a week, where it is just you and your wife. No kids.
  • Spend time together daily. Watch a TV show together, read a book, play a game, shop together. Just do something to be together daily.
  • Pray together. Studies have shown that couples that pray together, stay together.
  • Give a token that says, “I love you”. While at school or work, send your wife a text message saying, “I love you”. Leave a note at home. Do something that will let her know that you love her.
  • Consider showering when you get home. We all shower for when we have to leave to work. Have you ever thought of the impression you’d give your spouse if showered for her when you got home work, to get rid of that work smell? Try it.

Remember you are a husband first, a dad second. Everything else helps you fulfill your role as husband and father. Make sure you let your wife know that she is first in your life.

What are some other ways that you can show your spouse that they are number one?



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