Notes on Parenting

Insights for parenting babies, toddlers, teens, and young adults.

Wednesday, April 7, 2010

A Parenting Analogy

I once heard a comparison made in one of my classes comparing parenting to how you would want to be treated by a boss. I love this analogy. The example was given of a person showing up late to work several days in a row. Two scenarios were given. In the first, the boss yelled at the employee in front of everyone and threatened her that she may lose her job if the behavior continued. In the second scenario, the boss called the employee into his office, asked if everything was okay saying that he had noticed the employee's tardiness. The employee said that she had some family problems arise. Together the boss and employee discussed the problem and came up with a solution. The boss then expressed appreciation to the employee and willingness to work out the problem with her.

Which scenario would you prefer?

I think we can all agree that we would prefer the second scenario. Now, turning this to parenting, what kind of parent would you like to be? The parent that humiliates and yells at his child or the parent that shows respect and love for his child.

*Instead of threatening and yelling, take time to listen.

*Sit down with your child and talk through problems that arise coming up with a solution you can both live with.

*Try to remain calm and show your child the respect he/she deserves.

I know this is easier said than done, but as we make an effort to show respect and love to our children, I know and research shows that our parenting efforts will be better-received and much more productive. As you parent your children, think of how much more you would want to please a respectful boss than a boss who humiliates.

Do you think this analogy is helpful or can you think of a more meaningful comparison? What do you think parents should do when they are having a day where they find themselves yelling and having a difficult time using these strategies?

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